Monday, July 8, 2013

Preferring not to be a decrepit birth

I don't normally worry about matters of preference: coke vs. pepsi, ford vs. chevy, etc. but sometimes opinions are so jarring they must be addressed. Music is one of those preferences where no good can possibly come from arguing about it. Of course, people still endlessly debate the merits of bands or singers, "corporate" rock/pop, indies and the underground, or how hard one group is compared to another. Jello Biafra once said the reason the radical movements he was involved in never got anywhere was they were too busy arguing whether neurosis was more punk than screeching weasel. Or when he got jumped by some thugs and was injured he found a whole online discussion going back and forth whether or not he deserved it because he was some rich rock star.

In other words; petty, superficial, and completely meaningless. How is somehow "proving" that today's death metal is superior to twenty years ago going to accomplish anything? This is the kind of thing you hear from that most despised demographic in any society; teenage males. Leo Cawley, a professor of political economy and former marine squad leader in Vietnam, once said that Reagan, Gorbachev, and the Ayatollah could all agree that teenage boys are "undesirable." Hence why America starts a war every twenty years or so to kill off a bunch of them and throws many more in prison when at "peace." Any kind of in-depth discussion of generational strife would be silly, every generation has its alienated outliers. From beatniks to hippies to punks to the hipster, teenagers find a way to freak out their elders and bring condemnation to an entire generation by the assholes who hire and exploit the young.

What the hell happened to me? I used to believe I was the last person over thirty that could remember what it was like to be a teenager. That I could remember and identify with just how incredibly shitty it is to be between childhood and adulthood, responsibility but no rights, hormones messing with every aspect of physical and mental life, and trying to figure out what the point of life is. Maybe having a daughter and realizing that someday greasy boys will be fawning over her with the same ravenous hunger I once felt but could never act on. Yes, the military and prison are good places to store these rejects until they grow up a bit. Otherwise they are just going to think Decrepit Birth is a good name for a heavy metal band...

Those were the words emblazoned on the T-Shirt of the teenager seated across from me Saturday Night. I thought "Dear Christ, they really can just slap any two remotely tough sounding words together in drippy writing and call it a band name." I have no idea if they are any good or not, it is beside the point, I am not here to critique music. But I will say that the last time I saw Slayer play live, the opening acts were called American Head Charge and something Chimera. They were so incredibly awful I forgot why I was there in the first place. These decrepit babies are touring Europe right now with another facepalm named band, Jungle Rot. The fact that I went to high school with one of the jungle rottens changes not the fact that while that condition is horrifically metal it just sounds silly to say. Even worse is the silliness is not mitigated by drippy writing.

But this is so stupid I pray for nuclear holocaust.

Twenty-five years ago Jello Biafra released his first spoken word album, No More Cocoons. One of the tracks on that album was about band names, I highly recommend checking it out because it is both entertaining and poignant. Where the hell was I going with this post?

ROCK ON ALL YOU GOAT-SMELLING TEENAGERS!
SERIOUSLY, BLACK T SHIRTS WITH HORRIFIC IMAGERY GOT ME ALL KINDS OF CHICKS.

1 comment:

  1. The recent rush to push through anti-choice legislation is only one more example of how the Tea Party and radical GOP supporters aim to use the law to enforce their own religious values.

    The most offensive of these recent laws involves the ultrasound probe of women who seek to terminate a pregnancy. Given that these women have already consulted with a physician, this law is not founded on good medicine. It is, in fact, a waste of time and money. It provides no new information of any medical value. The enforced invasion mandated by this act serves little more than a show of power.

    The Tea Party/GOP attack on the freedom of choice for women stems from a religious view alone; this is not science. This is not medicine. This is a senseless assault on women. If such beliefs are practiced in private, that is their right. However, imposing these religious values and beliefs with the power of the state smacks of an inquisition. The fact that the bill’s authors, sponsors, and advocates are overwhelmingly male, suggests a deeper problem with the legislators who support it.

    It is likely that this bill also takes attention away from Walker’s failed economic policies. It is an old trick. Divert attention away from serious failures and give people something else to occupy their minds. Walker needs to distract the voters from his gross incompetence. He and his supporters can only show the continued failure in job creation along with an assault on education, jobs, and creating an environment for economic innovation.

    Make no mistake. Walker is using WI to seek a national stage and he doesn’t care who he uses: the poor, children, and women. He is happy to turn the religious beliefs of his followers into state law at the expense of human rights and dignity.

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